What to do when you can't stop worrying they'll leave
When you're anxious in a relationship, you can reread the message, replay the conversation and ask "are we okay?" all night and still not know. This book doesn't ask you to calm down. It gives you a plain description of what's going on, three questions for telling an anxious moment from a real problem, and one thing to try in each unit.
It's for you if you're in a relationship and you get anxious in it: you look for reassurance, you check your phone, you replay conversations or you spiral. It's for any partner, whatever your gender or theirs.
What's inside
1. What's going on when you get anxious in a relationship
2. Why it feels like an emergency
3. Anxious moment or real problem
4. The reassurance loop
5. The urge to check
6. Distance and silence
7. Saying what you need, plainly
8. What helps over weeks, and when to get a professional
Plus a plain names page, a support page for Australia, the United States and the United Kingdom, and a sources page.
What you get
One zip file with two copies of the same book:
- a phone-sized PDF, laid out for reading on your phone
- an A5 PDF, for printing or reading on a tablet or computer, with room to write on the exercise pages
Save both files to your device when you download. The link expires. If yours does, email hello@heyitsnardia.com and I'll send a new one.
What it won't do
It won't diagnose you or your partner. It won't promise you'll feel calmer, change your attachment style or fix the relationship. It won't tell you whether to stay or leave.
Who it isn't for
Stop here if you're afraid of your partner, or you're thinking about hurting yourself. This book can't help with that. Call the service for your country on the page at the back.
It also isn't for you if you want a diagnosis or a treatment for a condition, including if you wonder whether what you're dealing with is OCD, ADHD or BPD. A doctor or psychologist can help with that, and the book says where to start. It isn't for you if you want to change or diagnose your partner, or if the relationship has ended and you want it back. The book is for adults.
The support page at the back lists services for Australia, the United States and the United Kingdom, checked October 2026.
About me
I'm Nardia Barrett, an Australian coach. I'm a coach, not a therapist. This book isn't therapy, and it isn't medical, psychological or legal advice.
Looking for the other side of a silence? My book for someone whose partner goes quiet is When Your Partner Goes Silent.
Price is in Australian dollars. If something's wrong with the file, email hello@heyitsnardia.com and I'll replace it or refund you. The details are on the Refunds page.
What to do when you can't stop worrying they'll leave
When you're anxious in a relationship, you can reread the message, replay the conversation and ask "are we okay?" all night and still not know. This book doesn't ask you to calm down. It gives you a plain description of what's going on, three questions for telling an anxious moment from a real problem, and one thing to try in each unit.
It's for you if you're in a relationship and you get anxious in it: you look for reassurance, you check your phone, you replay conversations or you spiral. It's for any partner, whatever your gender or theirs.
What's inside
1. What's going on when you get anxious in a relationship
2. Why it feels like an emergency
3. Anxious moment or real problem
4. The reassurance loop
5. The urge to check
6. Distance and silence
7. Saying what you need, plainly
8. What helps over weeks, and when to get a professional
Plus a plain names page, a support page for Australia, the United States and the United Kingdom, and a sources page.
What you get
One zip file with two copies of the same book:
- a phone-sized PDF, laid out for reading on your phone
- an A5 PDF, for printing or reading on a tablet or computer, with room to write on the exercise pages
Save both files to your device when you download. The link expires. If yours does, email hello@heyitsnardia.com and I'll send a new one.
What it won't do
It won't diagnose you or your partner. It won't promise you'll feel calmer, change your attachment style or fix the relationship. It won't tell you whether to stay or leave.
Who it isn't for
Stop here if you're afraid of your partner, or you're thinking about hurting yourself. This book can't help with that. Call the service for your country on the page at the back.
It also isn't for you if you want a diagnosis or a treatment for a condition, including if you wonder whether what you're dealing with is OCD, ADHD or BPD. A doctor or psychologist can help with that, and the book says where to start. It isn't for you if you want to change or diagnose your partner, or if the relationship has ended and you want it back. The book is for adults.
The support page at the back lists services for Australia, the United States and the United Kingdom, checked October 2026.
About me
I'm Nardia Barrett, an Australian coach. I'm a coach, not a therapist. This book isn't therapy, and it isn't medical, psychological or legal advice.
Looking for the other side of a silence? My book for someone whose partner goes quiet is When Your Partner Goes Silent.
Price is in Australian dollars. If something's wrong with the file, email hello@heyitsnardia.com and I'll replace it or refund you. The details are on the Refunds page.
